What's happening? The cover says "No one escapes the Mandarin." So, I'm not entirely sure why we're here. The cover lied? Oh. Well, apparently someone DOES escape the Mandarin. And that someone is Iron Man. This is part two of the riveting "Mandarin whips Iron Man's ass" story arc that started last issue.
Iron Man convinces Mandarin to leave the room by claiming Tony Stark is running around the castle busting shit up. Mandarin falls for it and goes looking for Stark. I know Mandarin's probably really tough to work for, but does he not have any employees or a personal guard? Is there no lackey or minion to take care of puny old Stark? Iron Man escapes, battles Mandarin long enough to figure out how his anti-missile system works and rescues the poor missiles.
I still have no idea why Mandarin was stealing and hoarding the damn things in the first place.
ETC: In the last issue, Tony reveals in internal dialogue he might have a thing for Pepper, but he fears Happy has a thing for Pep, too. Tony returns from his successful mission, and Happy is there to pick him up from the airport. After acting all smug about what Iron Man did, Tony hops in the back of the car and gets cozy with Pepper. This annoys Happy, who decides to drive on a bumpy road to split them up. The car gets a flat, and Tony makes Happy change it while he and Pepper go on a moonlit walk.
Tony Stark is an asshole.
MIA: Marvel's usual bloated sense of self-worth. Instead of the now-common hyperbolic statement of "Best story we've ever written ever!" This one has "This may possibly be the greatest Iron Man epic yet produced!" Way to hedge your bets.
MVP: Happy. Tony left the former boxer and now chauffeur in charge. Read that again just so you can soak in the utter ridiculousness of it. Happy, as you might expect, does a terrible job. But he tried real hard, dammit. Plus, he changed the tire in the last panel.
WTF: Mandarin has a ring with a disintegrator ray? Holy shit. What else do you even need? Men in this very book launched careers with less. Mandy meanwhile puts the disintegrator ring on his pinky finger, that's how highly he values it. After Iron Man dodges its use one time, Mandarin resorts to some bullshit funhouse tactics. He makes himself seem like a giant, then uses the old "which one is the real me?" tactic. Hey, Mandarin. You have a disintegrator ray. What the fuck are you doing?
Bonus: This issue features a special "Inside Info About Iron Man" section that constitutes about five pages. It's all redundant if you've read the previous Tales of Suspense issues featuring Iron Man. The only real tidbit we get is that Pepper's real name is Virginia. Oh good, glad to see that this love triangle features more than one person with a human name. Also, Virginia? I'd go with Pepper, too.
No comments:
Post a Comment