What's happening? Tony Stark has retired from being Iron Man to concentrate on being a complete jerk full-time. The comic opens to reveal Tony is tired of not knowing what moment might be his last. He throws off the suit intending to enjoy what might be left of his life. This, of course, means he's an utter dickhole to anyone and everyone. Tony goes out on the town with some fast women but not before mocking Happy and making Pepper feel unwanted. He blows off a call from the Avengers, leading to a subsequent suspension from that squad later. While Tony's on a rampage of asshole-ness, some guy in an orange helmet-chest-piece onesy attacks the Stark HQ looking to challenge Iron Man to a fight.
His name is Unicorn and he shoots a laser out of a bump on his helmet. Of course, he does. Uni plants a bomb in Tony's lab and Iron Man is forced to surrender or else the whole place goes up. Once Uni gets Iron Man on the plane bound for Russia, though, Iron Man goes apeshit and tears the plane apart, leaving Unicorn headed into the ground like a dart, and empty-handed.
ETC: Unicorn isn't just some crazy with an oddly placed power source. He's a former compatriot of Vanko (Crimson Dynamo) and current agent for the mean old Russians. He reveals via flashback how awesome his helmet/vest is when he uses the ray to do various things (among them, blow up a common target around these parts, a poor tank). The horn shoots lasers, emits a forcefield, does some magnetic trickery, etc, etc. So, you just know he's gonna whip Iron Man's ass.
MIA: Any sort of class from Tony Stark. Not only is he a complete ass in the first half of the comic thanks to his new worldview, but when Happy is hospitalized after being knocked around by Unicorn and Pepper is kidnapped, Stark ditches his date by telling her to get a cab (but not offering to pay) then telling the doctor at the hospital that money is no object and do everything for Happy. Old Doc Baldy lets Tony know everyone gets primo treatment around these parts, so can it, asshole.
MVP: Doc Baldy and the crack staff at whatever hospital this place is. Unicorn beat the ever-living shit outta Happy. But at the end, we see the big lug wrapped up in bandages and chilling in a hospital bed. He'll be fine and everything works out. During Tony and Pepper's visit to Happy's bedside, though, we start to get the feeling that Pepper might return Happy's affections, leaving Tony to wonder if Pepper is doing that just to make him jealous or if she really has feelings for Happy. Good gravy, Tony, you blew off work today to go out poon-hunting, I think it's OK if Pepper flirts with another guy, ya know?
WTF: So, Unicorn is a fairly bright guy. I mean, he used the bomb trick to get Iron Man to surrender. He talks a big game, at least. But once Iron Man agrees to get on the plane if Unicorn disarms the bomb, Unicorn suddenly becomes incredibly stupid. He doesn't have any way to detain Iron Man. Not even a pair of shackles or some kinda... disarming ray... I mean, did you really think the guy was just gonna enjoy the in-flight movie and wait to get his ass kicked when you crossed the iron curtain? C'mon, man.
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